Köln - Madrid and other stories

Umweltplakette – para residentes y visitantes

Quedan tres días para procurarse la Umweltplakette sin la cual no se podrá circular en coche en la casi totalidad de Colonia.

A partir del 1 de abril, cualquier vehículo que circule en Colonia sin esta pegatina podrá ser multado.

Esta normativa aplica tanto para los que utilizan su coche regularmente en la zona regulada como para los que estén simplemente de paso, sea cual sea su procedencia.

En cualquier caso, el procedimiento para procurarse la Umweltplakette se encuentra aquí: http://www.umwelt-plakette.de/int_spanien.php?SID=lsgm3lkc9fedfnmovte70m18g2

Además, aquí están unos datos en alemán: http://www.koeln.de/artikel/Koeln/Umweltzone-Das-muessen-Sie-wissen-37354-1.html

Y la misma página de koeln.de suministra unos datos muy completos - el formulario a descargar y los modos de pago - en inglés: http://www.stadt-koeln.de/en/lowemissionzone/article/11609/index.html

Umweltplakette – pour résidents et visiteurs

Il ne reste que trois jours pour se procurer la Umweltplakette sans laquelle les véhicules ne peuvent désormais plus circuler dans la quasi-totalité de Cologne sans être passibles d’une amende.

A partir du 1^er avril, les conducteurs qu’ils soient résidents ou de passage dans la ville, devront arborer sur leur véhicule un autocollant correspondant à leur niveau d’émission de particules.

Tous les détails pour se procurer cet autocollant à apposer sur la voiture, tant pour les résidents que pour les visiteurs, se trouvent sur le site de koeln.de, ici : http://www.koeln.de/tourismus/koelntourismus/cms/artikel.php/30/1793/artikel.html

Et également sur le site de koeln.de : http://www.umwelt-plakette.de/int_frankreich.php?SID=lsgm3lkc9fedfnmovte70m18g2

Umweltplakette – for residents and visitors

There are only three days left to get the compulsory Umweltplakette required for driving in the whole of the city centre and most Cologne areas.

Whether you live in the city or you are just visiting, if you intend to drive, you need this sticker. You may be fined otherwise.

All the details on how to get the Umweltplakette, and which areas of the city are concerned, are available here:
http://www.stadt-koeln.de/en/lowemissionzone/article/11609/index.html

and here:
http://www.umwelt-plakette.de/int_england.php?SID=lsgm3lkc9fedfnmovte70m18g2

It was nice to be back in England for a few days, enjoy a bit of shopping, a proper British girls night out – yay! –  and a smokeless one at that, thanks to the smoking ban - double yay!
I also enjoyed getting to know my friends ever so cute and sociable baby who gave me the occasion to rekindle with my Auntie side. Weatherwise we managed to have sun, wind, rain, hail and snow all in the same day.

And now, I am back in Cologne and so is the winter. It has been snowing for most of today, and it has not stopped yet. This morning we had a snow battle on our way to get some Brötchen for breakfast, while our elderly neighbours were trying not to slip over on their way to mass. We spent the rest of the day curled up in the sofa watching old movies: way to do nothing on a bank holiday!

I also hope my orange tree and freshly growing herbs survive this one.

And I also hope it stops snowing at some point as I now have summer tires. Now, if it is snowing in Cologne, I can just imagine what it must look like at my dealership and the prospect of driving 40 miles on hilly snowy country roads to get my tires changed is not making me jump with joy…

A blast at a chemical plant in Dormagen spread all over Cologne earlier this afternoon a toxic cloud of ethylene and acrylonitrile.

Information - in German - and emergency phone numbers can be found in the Kölner Stadt Anzeiger.

So I am stuck at home, all windows shut, waiting for the ethylene-acrylonitrile combo to dissipate and watching the news. The latest information a few minutes ago indicates that it is still lingering at 500 metres over our heads.

Meanwhile, I am watching again a video that my German boss sent me some time ago. Where I work, English is a compulsory language. Basically, if you do not speak English, you do not get hired.

But the lack of knowledge of the language can go one step further and be deadly. Watch this:

The Cologne Carnival officially closed its doors yesterday, on Ash Wednesday. After six days of festivities, it is time to pack up and be a little more… sober.
I am not religious but I am accompanying a friend in a lighter version of her observance of Lent, and as I am not supposed to eat anything too sweet, this can only do me good. So, no Haribo Gummibärchen and no Nutella for 40 days… which is by the way an actual total of 45 days.

So, what has been happening in this intensively festive week, then?

Thursday – Weiberfastnacht
At 10:00am we are all at work. Physically at least, because at this exact time, just over one hour before Carnival, each and every single employee is joining the colleagues into small groups and stuffing their face with Berliners, basically a jam doughnut without the hole in the middle. Me included of course, making a mess of all the sugar coating that has not been designed to stay on top of the Berliner apparently.

At 11:11am, the carnival week starts. In many offices women have half the day off, go out and party. Or alternatively they party in the office. I was released at noon and by that time I was feeling like a clear female minority in the office.

And now, the party could start: direction, the city centre, Rudolfplatz and then Severinstraße. Well, I was under the impression this was a women’s festivity, but it seems it is not exactly so. Turns out some friends turned up with their boyfriends who kept asking me where mine was.
The tradition however has been kept at work, judging by the disgruntled male faces on Friday, of the ones whose wife had gone and party without them.
Yes, I had to work on Friday and this was a horrible experience, I shall make a mental note of taking this day off next year.

Sunday - Kölner Schull- un Veedelszöch
On Sunday at around noon, we head for the Altstadt to meet some friends to see the Schull- un Veedelszöch “school and quarters” parade.
One beer and one schnapps later (so, a few hours later as I am a slow drinker), feeling very hungry indeed, we start shouting “Kamelle!”, moving the right arm in the air from left to right, to get some of the sweets that are thrown from the carnival floats.

After the parade, we head towards the Kneipe area to get some food and start the night. At any Kneipe we go to, the music soundtrack will consist of:
- Denn wenn et Trömmelche jeht
- Viva Colonia
- Hey Kölle Du Bes E Jeföhl
- Mer Losse D’r Dom En Kolle
- Wenn Nicht Jetzt, Wann Dann?, the 2007 Handball WM anthem
- Der treuer Husar, which is beautiful but I can’t sing it because it makes me emotional and I do not know what to say when a German asks me if this song is really famous in other countries
- Die Karawane Zieht Weiter
- Rut sin de Ruse
- Schön ist das Leben
- Drink Doch Eine Met
- Komm’ hol das Lasso raus!
- Ich bin ein Döner
- Das Rote Pferd

And the worse thing is, yes, I now know most of the choruses of all these songs, even and especially the ones that are sang in Kölsch language, yes I did the caravan in the caravan song (well, if absolutely all the Kneipe patrons were doing it, I was not going to say in a corner, that is my excuse anyway), yes, I know the choreography of the cowboy song and I know that I have been singing something about Mallorca and also a very scatological song.
I wonder in which other of the places I have lived in, I could have possibly done that and had fun at the same time: the answer is probably none.

Monday - Rosenmontag
Slightly hungover and with the rain pouring down outside, we decide to stay home and watch part of the 5-hour long main parade on the telly. I manage to spot my company’s president on one of the carnival floats, mainly because the speaker mentions him: I did not even know which committee he was on, shame on me. I try to spot Heidi Klum and Seal, but I don’t think they were on this year.

Tuesday – Nubbelverbrennung
Still not fully recovered and with a cold lurking about, I go back to work on Tuesday and, too tired to go anywhere, I stay home and miss the Nubbelverbrennung , which is when the Kneipe burn dolls that represent the sins that have been committed in the city and everything is forgiven.

Ash Wednesday
Abiding by the tradition, we have fish for dinner.

Carnival, the fifth season, is now over. Looking forward to the next one.

- Costume

- Back-up costume

- Very large red and white hat

- Cologne scarf

- Red and white leggings

- Cologne transfers

- Cathedral shaped bag with beer holder (that will never hold anything, pretty sure of it)

- Warm boots

- Warm gloves

- Warm clothing

- A map of the KVB network

- Small change for the tram

- A pair of scissors to cut ties and shoe laces

- Flu jab: I’ll just try not to catch anything serious with all the kissing (Bützen) going on

- Mobile phone with a charged battery

- Tons of water for… you know… after

- Paracetamol, for… see above

- Vitamin C

Weiberfastnacht here we come! In one hour I am out of here: a lot of offices are giving the women half the day off for this special Carnival occasion. I shall ignore my man for the rest of the day and go party with the girls.

Kölle Alaaf everyone!